Tools You Can Use

Sure, there are plenty of tips and tools you can use to help get those butterflies flying in formation, but the real secret lies much deeper inside all of us. If you’d rather just start with the tools, here are a few that can help:

• Know your content. If you don’t know it well, go study.
• Prepare and rehearse. Run through your talk a few times. We even suggest you stand in the room you will be presenting to rehearse.
• Prepare for the tough questions. You’re going to get some. Speculate on the toughest questions you might get, and then rehearse your responses to them.
• Arrive early. Running late for anything will increase your heart rate and anxiety level. You don’t need that today.

But, what’s the deeper solution?

I’m glad you asked. This is the more permanent solution. This is the solution that provides a true foundation to confident public speaking. The true root of overcoming fear and anxiety of public speaking is simply this… be present. That’s it. If it sounds too simple, you’re right. It is simple. But that doesn’t make it easy.

What’s the key to being present?

I’m going to ask you to stick with me and hear me out. I’m preparing you because some of you are going to read the next paragraph, roll your eyes and say, “Oh brother! Please…” right before you exit this web page. Please don’t! Stick with me until the end…

The key to being present is getting your mind and body to occupy the same space and time. The way to do that is with meditation.

I knew it! You rolled your eyes didn’t you?!

Please hear me out! I’m not talking about sitting in a lotus position, staring at a candle and burning incense in a dark room.

Do you know what mediation is? It’s one thing. That’s it. That’s the definition of mediation… one thing. To meditate you don’t clear your mind of everything. When you meditate, you clear your mind of everything except for one thing.

What’s the one thing?

It really doesn’t matter. Just focus on one thing for two minutes. If you know anyone who meditates regularly, ask them what you should focus on for two minutes and I bet they’ll tell you to start with your breathing. Just focus on your breathing for two minutes. Don’t change your breathing. Just focus on it. Notice your breathing.

For me, I usually coach people to pick one of their 5 senses and then focus on the data currently coming in through that port (you’re just like a computer!) for two minutes. My personal favorite is the sense of touch.

How I coach my leaders to meditate

I first learned this technique from my good friend and speaking coach, Paul Slattery. If I have a leader struggling with some anxiety before a presentation, I will find a quiet place for us to sit. Once he’s seated and still, I have him notice what he feels starting with the lowest touch point on his body (his foot in his shoe, pressure from the floor on the sole of his foot, etc.)

Then, we work up the body to the next touch point he can feel (one leg crossed and sitting on top of another leg). Then, move up the body to the next touch point (back of the thighs sitting on the chair). This continues until we reach the head. I have him turn his head slightly to feel it move. Then we work our way back down to the feet using the same checkpoints.

If you do this system check using your body’s sense of touch, up and down the body twice, you’ve just meditated for about 2 minutes!

Why does this work?

This is the essence of presence. The presence you project to others is rooted in your mind and body being in the same place. In other words, if your mind and body are occupying the same space and time, you’re present!

You know this is true because I’m sure you’ve had conversations with others and you can tell when their mind is someplace else. It bothers you. We want someone to be fully present when they’re communicating with us. Being fully present has benefits for both the speaker and the audience.

Before you speak, if you allow your mind to travel through space and time instead of being present, it starts to tell your brain stories and it takes you off your game.

• “I remember the last time I presented to this group and they tore me up with tough questions!” (Your mind is in the past.)
• “I just know they’re going to ask me a tough question and I won’t have the answer… or I’m going to forget something and lose my train of thought!” (Your mind is in the future… a false future!)

Get your head in the game!

If you played sports, my guess is your coach has dropped this one on you before. And she couldn’t have been more correct. Getting your head in the game means you bring it into the present. You get your mind to be in the same space and time as your body. That’s where your body is doing all the work right now… and it needs the brain to pull its weight too!

Be present for your audience.
It serves both you and the audience.

It’s where you live

In reality, the present is the only place you can really live. You can plan for the future and you can remember the past, but living can only take place in the present. So you might as well let your brain live a little too. Why should the body have all the fun?

Until next time,

Russ

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iSpeak teaches workshops on Professional Selling to help sales leaders gather the most important data and then use that information to create the right message. Are your sales presentations closing eyelids or deals?

Russ Peterson Jr. is the co-founder and Managing Director of iSpeak, Inc. – An award-winning professional development training company. Russ is a speaker, international trainer, and published author on Professional Sales Communication and Business Communication. He delivers workshops, keynotes, and personal communication coaching services to business professionals in the US and around the world. His leadership blog assists leaders in giving voice to their vision. You can connect with Russ directly through Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn.

You’ve heard it plenty of times, “It’s not WHAT you say that’s most important, it’s HOW you say it.” I disagree with that statement. I don’t think the WHAT or the HOW is most important. What’s most important is “what they HEAR!”

Too often I feel like the emphasis we put on speaking skills is on the speaker without putting too much thought into the WHY behind everything we coach into a speaker. Why would we coach a speaker to do the following:

• slow down when you say this line
• give a pause immediately after you ask this question
• make sure your eye contact lands on other eyeballs
• step toward the audience when you transition to this content

Why should we care?

As a coach, why do I care if the speaker does any of these things? Why is it important? Why do I think it would be good for the speaker to implement some of these things? Why…??

If we can’t answer the why question then we shouldn’t be coaching these things into people. I think sometimes we all lose sight of this “why” and it starts to hurt our own coaching and communication. There is an answer to the why question and it’s extremely important. But we may have to ask the why question several times to get to the real answer.

Why do you want the speaker to pause after that question?

Because… it will go the audience time to think about it.

Why do you want them to think about it?

Because… it will be more engaging to the audience.

Why do you want it to be engaging to the audience?

Because… I want them to really listen to the message.

Why do you want them to listen to the message?

Because… they will need to understand this to get their work done effectively.

There it is!

There is the real benefit to the audience. The speaker speaks for the audience… always! I know the speaker showed up that day for a reason. The speaker has a goal to accomplish by speaking. But sometimes we forget the audience showed up for a reason too. Sometimes they have their own goals for attending the session.

Even if the audience doesn’t know why they showed up, they will assume they will gain something by being there. There is a benefit to them attending and you (the speaker) needs to make sure they get it. Do you want to know the secret to being one of the greatest communicators ever? It’s actually quite simple. Always give the audience what they came for!

“ Always give the audience what they came for!

You see it’s not WHAT you say that’s most important, and it’s not HOW you say it that’s most important. What’s most important is what the audience HEARS. The audience shows up for a reason.

So when it comes to you coaching yourself or others, it doesn’t take a masters degree in Neuro-Linguistic Programming to offer the best coaching. You just need to make sure you’ve answered the one question everyone in the audience has… “Why should I listen?”

Still trying to give them what they came for…

See you next week,
Russ

Ever wonder what your audience thinks of you? Have you tried your best to read their body language and facial expressions? What do they really think of you? Do they see you as an expert? Do they know you’re not? Can they see you’re nervous? The questions they ask might be your best clue. Here’s why…

3 Types of Requests from Your Audience

My good friend Sara Canaday wrote an insightful book (You According to Them) on how the world perceives you. She goes into amazing depth on the styles of communicators and what your style says about a you. I highly recommend you add it to your reading list!

From what I’ve personally discovered from public speaking, there are three types of questions you’ll get from your audience. Each type of request is a snapshot into how this person perceives you.

Here’s an exercise you can do the next time you speak. Listen to the types of questions you’re asked and document them all. Then, place each question into one of the following 3 buckets. If you get a large majority of questions in one bucket, it should tell you something about how your audience sees you.

1. They Question Your Data

What were the numbers last quarter? How did you calculate that? What were the numbers in the SouthEast Region? This is when your audience asks you to provide numbers on a dashboard for the project you’ve been working on. Just the report card from tracking the data. You’re asked to compile the records, sum the information, and consolidate it all into one report. Then, as you present your dashboard slide, the audience asks questions about the numbers.

The Audience sees you as…

A MESSENGER. You’re a collector of data and information. They want to know you’re a credible source for the data. What happens with the data or how it’s interpreted or used will be determined by the audience. They’ll do the analysis of the data and then decide on next steps. You’re not asked for an expert opinion. You’re just asked to report the accurate data to them. You’re not invited into the decision-making process.

2. They Ask for Your Analysis

Sometimes the audience needs you to interpret the data. They lack the expertise you possess. Your personal interpretation of the data provides helpful insights and meaning. They might ask you, “What does all this mean? Why is this significant? How can we use this information?” The audience will ask you questions they can’t answer on their own because they’re not the subject matter expert… you are!

The Audience sees you as…

An EXPERT. You have the ability to interpret the data. Information becomes knowledge when it can be interpreted for a real-world application. The audience can’t analyze the information on their own because they lack the ability. You’re a sage expert in their eyes. They need your expert opinion to help them find value in the information.

3. They Question the Future

Once we analyze data for meaning, the next step is to apply it to our own personal world. When we learn some information from a speaker, we all go through a translation process. That’s where we take the knowledge we’ve gained and apply it to our own personal world so we can benefit from it.

Every time we learn something new, we all want to know how we can personally benefit from this information. “How do we apply this to our world to make our future better?” That’s the question the audience wants you to answer for them when their questions focus on the future.

The Audience sees you as…

A LEADER. You have the ability to positively affect the future. While all leaders live in the present to get things done, all leaders also have a vision of the future. When the audience asks you about applying information and knowledge to the future they might ask you predictive or “what if…” types of questions. Show them how to get value out of your information by applying it to their future and you’ll be seen as a leader.

“ All leaders are going somewhere and all leaders have followers. —RUSS PETERSON JR.

Now also keep in mind your audience might be asking you the level 2 and level 3 questions even when they have their own expertise or opinions because they are inviting you into an expert or leadership role. The great coaches and leaders develop others by challenging them with questions to take them out of their comfort zone. That is where the growth happens!

I hope you all have a coach in your audience inviting you into the next step of your career.

Let me know if you have any questions!
Russ